my friend the alpha

dinner as truths unfold

Mae's POV

We pulled up to the pack house and I froze. Why was I doing this, I still hate him so why did I reach out and touch him as I was climbing into the car. And why was the ride here so comfortable and peaceful. I can't fall for his charm. He ignored me the last year we were friends and now he's actually the alpha. How am I to believe that won't be the case now if I stay with him. I won't be some silent luna who just stands beside the alpha and party plans events. He will see me or I'm gone. I guess dinner will tell how dependable he really can be. His dad never made it through one meal without being pulled away.

My door opened and Tyler extended his hand to me. I reluctantly took it only because we were in a lifted jeep and I didn't want to make a fool of myself getting out. I had to pause when our hands first made contact, the igitial sparks exploding across my body and I had to stable myself to jump down. As soon as my feet hit the ground I took my hand out of him. I knew the mate bond would only grow stronger and be harder to resist the longer I went unmarked.

Tyler entered the house. I had been her many times before but its been two years and it seems when he took over he changed somethings up.

The house used to be in tones of white and grey but now had a more rustic feel with dark wood fixtures and forest green walls. It was surprisenly calming.

He nodded towards the stairs and I headed to his office while he popped down the hall to the kitchen probably asking for food to be brought up to us.

As I open the door to his office I am taken back by the change of decor. His once simple and basic office was now fully furnished and painted. The walls were the old grey tones the main house had before with dark wood furniture and red accenting pieces throughout. The couch was gone and in its place a chaise sat angled away from the wall with a small table sat beside it with a book opened and laid faced down to hold its spot.

I picked the book up and read what was on the open page. It seemed to be a journal of sorts. I read the first line and was completely baffled by what I read.

"Today's her birthday, It been two years and I still wish she'd come running through that door forcing me into some childish games that would have us both on the floor dying from laughter. At the very least come to me to take her blood oath. She made me promise when she was fourteen that on her eighteenth birthday we would spend the day pranking my alpha guards. I thought about doing just that today but without her it just seems pointless. Moon goddess please send me my Luna soon so I can get over Mae. I know she lost her mom but in turn I lost her and I can't lead my pack if I can't get over the girl I never had."

He's right he did lose me when she died. I never thought about it like that. I never thought about anybodies pain but my own. Reading this now I feel slightly guilty for blaming him. What if I hadn't ran out that night. Would I have still early shifted. Would my mind have gone so dark. Would Jess and I ended up becoming friends.

Im his Mate we've been destined to be together and I abandoned him and made his life hell for two years. All the while I drowned my sorrows in tequila and petty crimes. Was it really worth it. Was it really "what I needed" or maybe what I really needed was him all along...

Tears streamed down my cheeks as I heard the door unlatch. I quickly put the journal down and crossed the room to the window. I hear the door shut and I suck back in my tears. He can't know I read his journal.

He rests his hand on my shoulder and I lean into it. A sniffle excapes me. He turns me to face toward him cupping my chin and turning my face up. He knows I've been crying. His thumb brushes my cheeks wiping away the stray tears that slide down them.

"Whats wrong?" he said.

Thinking quickly I respond "You said you'd never decorate your office, that you'd leave it to your luna to put her personal touches on."

Realizing I am his luna and he didn't wait for me he pulled me in close nuzzling my head into his shoulder and strocking my hair.

"Would you like to change it. Anything can be alter or change. The paint is still fresh... I only just made these changes a few days ago... I had given up hope. You didn't come to me for your blood oath so I knew I had lost you. I thought to be the leader my pack needed, I needed to let go of my best friend and forget about my someday luna. They need a right now alpha afterall not a someday leader."

His words hit me again just like his journal and I couldn't stop myself from curling into his arms, wrapping my arms around his waist and crying into his chest.

"I'm so sorry I did this to you. I was suffering but I didn't realize I caused you to suffer too."

He just held me close until the tears all dried. never stopping stroking my hair or loosenes his hold on me.

When my heart had calmed and the tears ended he pulled back just slightly and said. "It was all worth it just to have you hear now."

How could I have walked away from this perfect man. So sweet and patient and kind. You'd think hours ago had never happened that he hadn't come to the school to kick me out and make me a rogue. He came to bring his Luna home. But am I ready to come back. I'm feeling all theses things for Tyler now but what about tomorrow or next week or next month. will the past boil up. Will he resent me for abandoning him. Will I resent him for not trying harder or for moving on without me. What if he starts to be distant like he used to be. It's all so much in such a short time.

He can see the worry on my face and at that moment a knock came from the door.

"Enter"

The door opened and in walked Justin and two other males. He carried two chairs while the others carried a large table. They set them down and left the room only to be followed up by two omegas who set the place setting for us and brought in our meals. They gave the alpha a slight bow and exited the room closing the door behind them.

"Shall we?" Tyler asked.

I nodded and he guided me to the table, pulling a chair out for me and then scooting it in. He took his seat across from me, lit the candles, and place his napkin on his lap.

"Can I ask... How have you been? I'm afraid it may be an obvious answer but I really just want to talk with you and catch up. So tell me everything. The good, the bad, the scary... I would like to hear it all... if that's ok with you."

I thought for a moment. At first I didn't know how to truely answer that. I quit allowing myself to feel the world and so I wasn't sure how to respond.

"Ive been a mess. Losing mom... I felt like I was suffocating. I was so angry with you and when you didn't come to the funeral I thought you were so heartless which only fueled my pain. I began to lash out at everyone for no reason. Eventually most teachers just started to pretend I wasn't there. Jess came to the funeral tho. And then she kept bumping into me at school. I stayed with her for a bit and eventually we became friends. She never asked many questions. We'd just listen to music, complain about you, drank and ocassionally cause a little michief. When she decided her and Justin needed to focus on the future and go to patrol school, It's like my heart broke all over again. I didn't care about going to class any more, turning in assignments, anything. Mrs. Louis caught me ditching class the one day I decided to show up and I just lost it. I ditched my next class after that and spent the day tagging hate words about her in every girls bathroom I could. I had decided today when I was sent to her office that I wasn't going to finish out the year. I would work my last few shift at the coffee shop this week and then I was going to take my inheritance money and skip town, sever my bond with the pack and just live as a rogue among the humans. O and as you know I shifted but until today I had never spoken to my wolf, she would just wimper in pain from time to time when ever I was sad. But then you showed up... Now I don't know whats going on or what to think."

I took a drink of my water and looked down at my plate just noticing he had served me my favorite traditional birthday meal, Steak and twice baked mac n cheese with bacon bits. My eyes began to water again as I looked up at him.

He sat there calmly just staring at me. a slight smile cracking across his lips.

"I didn't think you would let me come to the funeral but I was there. I stood across the graveyard behind the old oak trees by the storage shed but I was there. And after the funeral and every month for the first year I brought her flowers on the monthly aniversary of her passing."

"You did?"

"Yes I did. I've been busier this last year so now I send one of the omegas once a month to clean up the site. some times they leave flowers other time they will leave little trinkets of their own in memory of her. She was important to alot of the pack you know. Before your father passed she was very active with the omegas. insurring no one was over worked and providing them the time to take care of personal matter when needed."

"I never knew, I was seven when he died. All I remember was her always being home after that."

"I don't remember much of your father but there are stories we tell to the you children and patrol trainees around here of him. I can share them with you if you'd like."

All though I really wanted to know more about my father. I have been sad for too long.

"Not right now. I have something else in mind."