Pleasure and Pain (Not your typical love affair)

Kabanata 8—Started to Cry

"HEY, what are you two doing?"

Marhianna's brows furrowed and was about to walk towards us when the front door suddenly opened. Iniluwa nun si Alaric, ang boss niya.

"Anna, you forgot this in in my car," He handed her a paper bag kaya bumaling doon si Marhianna.

Agad naman akong nag-iwas at pasimpleng inayos ang damit kong nagulo ni Juddah. I am still fidgeting. Kinakabahan ako dahil kung hinayaan ko si Juddah sa gagawin niya ay baka nahuli na kaming dalawa. And I don't know what will happen if Marhianna caught us.

"Don't over think about it, Maldrid. Just always remember, we both enojoyed it," Juddah coldly said as he stood up and walks toward his cousin and Marhianna--like he didn't do something behind my mother's back.

"Maldrid, baby, what are you doing there? Come here."

Saka lang ako tila natauhan sa pagkakatula nang tawagin ako ni Marhianna. Dahan-dahan akong tumayo at nanginginig ang tuhod na lumapit sa kanila.

I can see through my peripheral vision that Juddah's hand were possessively wrapped on Marhianna's waist.

I cursed. How can he act like he's so loyal to her?

"Are you okay, Maddi? You look pale," she innocently asked.

I blinked and nodded. "Y-yeah. B-blame it to J-Juddah. We've watched a horror movie and--"

"That's why you are sweating?" Marhianna chuckled before looking up on her suitor, "Juddah honey, kung gusto mong makuha ang loob ni Maldrid, don't ask her to watch a horror movie. Matatakutin 'yan."

Good thing, tapos na ang movie dahil kung hindi ay baka nabuking na kami at hindi naman horror ang pinapanuod namin.

"It's effective, Marhianna. I can tell that she enjoyed it. It was worth it," Juddah said like it has a double meaning.

Kumuyom ang mga kamao ko. I don't know what's with Juddah and what he is planning dahil nararamdaman ko na parang wala lang to sa kanya. Feels like hindi siya natatakot sa ginagawa naming dalawa.

I averted my gaze from them. Baka mahalata nilang guilty ako. Nanginginig pa rin ako hanggang ngayon at malakas pa rin ang kabog ng dibdib ko.

"Anyway, what are we still doing here? We can go to the couch and sit. Hindi 'yung nakatayo dito ngayon sa may pinto." Marhianna chuckled and caressed Juddah's arm.

"That's what I thought too," Alaric said. "Anyways, it's already late, Ana. Hinatid lang talaga kita and for me to give this to your daughter, personally."

Because of that, my gaze darted to Marhianna's boss. He was all smile on me.

"Hi there, Gorgeous. I have something for you." Inabot niya ang kanang kamay ko at hinalikan ang likod nun.

Because of Alaric's aura, naibsan papaano ang kabang nararamdaman ko.

"W-what's this?" Ngumiti ako at inabot ang paper bag na kanina lamang ay hawak niya.

"Open it kapag nakaalis na ako."

"T-thank you, Alaric."

"Maldrid, he's my boss. You should call him--"

Alaric cut Marhianna. He chuckled. "It's alright, Anna. So, paano? I gotta go now. Juddah, my cousin," baling niya kay Juddah na naka-igting lang ang panga at masama ang tingin sa pinsan niya. He tapped the latter's shoulder before gazing on me. "Good bye, Gorgeous. I hope you will like my pasalubong to you."

I smiled and nodded. "For sure, I will."

He again face my Mother and kissed her on the cheek, not minding even Juddah's hugging her thight.

"Good bye my beautiful Secretary. See you after your leave. Enjoy your vacation." He winked.

"Thank you, Alaric."

Silenced filled us after we left. Marhianna's just caressing Juddah's cheek while the latter's just seriously looking at him.

I cleared my throat. "Mauuna na ako sa taas." I went back to the couch and get my blanket. While walking up on the stairway, my knees were still shaking. At nang makarating sa kwarto, saka lang ako nakahinga ng maluwag.

I sat on the edge of the bed and stared at nothing. I was just thinking about what Juddah and I did. It's slowly sinking on me and really wanted to hurt myself. Kahit hindi malaman ni Marhianna, I know in myself na malaki ang kasalanan ko sa kanya.

Oh God! Please forgive me!

Matagal akong nakatitig sa kawalan before I decided to open the pasalubong Alaric gave me. It was a beach Maxi Dress. And I was about to check it when I saw a card in it.

Hey Gorgeous. Please wear this dress in your beach vacation. Anna didn't know na pinuslit ko ang card na 'to. Pinagbawalan niya kasi ako, kasi alam niyang nagandahan ako sa 'yo. And she's right. You're beautiful and I really want to date you. Promise, I'm single.

Kahit papaano ay napangiti ako sa nabasa ko. I heaved a sighed and started to take off my shirt para sukatin ang dress nang bumukas naman ang pinto ng kwarto ko.

My eyes bulge and I cursed, "What the hell, Juddah! What are you doing here? Get out! Oh my God!" I am now panicking.

Nasa kabilang room lang ang kwarto ni Marhianna at natatakot ako na baka maabutan niyang nandito ang manliligaw niya kapag pinuntahan niya ako dito. She's used on checking on me before she go to sleep.

"Scared that she might caught us?" He chuckled and walks towards me. He encircled his arm on my waist and stared directly in to my eyes. "And now, this is what you call cheating, Maldrid. You're now afraid of what is happening between us. Hmm. I like it."

"Juddah! Anu ba!" I tried to push him away from me. He's like a demon to me now. I don't really know why he is doing this. Ano ba talaga ang plano niya?

"Don't worry, Maldrid, this will be our little dirty secret," he whispered and nibbled ny earlobe that made me gasp.

"Juddah! Please! Get out now."

He breathed heavily and glared at me. "Are you guilty now, huh? Don't be! We are just only starting. We're not in the middle yet. I want you to fall in love with me--"

I slapped him. "H-how could you say that? Ipagsasabay mo kami ni Marhianna? O baka naman, gusto mo akong mahulog sa 'yo pero si Marhianna pa rin ang pipiliin mo? Ang sama mo!"

I am really confused. I know he's up to something. Pero bakit kaylangan pang dumating sa puntong dapat mahulog ako sa kanya?

He clenched his jaw. I stepped back when he walks towards me.

"Juddah!" I gasp when he pushed me to the bed. Napahiga ako at agad niyang kinubabawan.

He stared directly into my eyes. "You want me to stop courting her, then?" His left hand was pinned on my right side while his other hand were now caressing my cheek. "Just tell me, baby," he huskily said.

I bit my lower lip. Iniwas ko ang tingin at tinulak siya. Don't Maddi! 'Wag kang magpadala sa mga salita niya!

I get up on the bed. "Get out, Juddah."

He shrugged his shoulder. "If you think that I will stop, well... think again. I already told you, we are just starting."

Nanlulumong napaupo ako sa carpeted floor at napaiyak. What have I've done? Ano itong napasok ko?

"Do you like here? Hey, Maldrid, baby. Are you okay?"

I was back with my senses when Marhianna snapped on me. "H-ha?"

"Are you okay? Kahapon ka pa tahimik. What's wrong?"

I averted my gaze and sat at the bed here in the hotel in Palawan where we checked in. Kadarating pa lang namin galing airport.

How can I answer Marhianna? Kahit kami na lang dalawa ang magkasama, I can't help but to think Juddah. Hinatid niya kami sa airport dahil hindi siya makakasama. And that was a good news to me. But on our way here, I received a message coming from an unknown number. At kahit hindi sabihin, I know it was him.

"Maldrid." Naupo si Marhianna sa tabi ko at pinisil ang kamay ko. "Do you have a problem? You can tell it to me. Baka pwede kitang tulungan."

I heaved a sighed and vow my head. I can't stare at her eyes. I am so guilty. "W-what if I've done something bad to you? Will you... still forgive me?"

Silence filled us for a minute before she speak.

"Of course. I love you, Maddi kaya kahit anong gawin mo, papatawarin kita. Coz you know what? You're the best thing happened to me."

Mas lalo akong kinain ng konsensya ko. I know that Mahrianna loves me so much. Kaya paano kong nagawa 'to sa kanya?

"T-thank you, Mom." I hugged her tight and silently cried on her shoulder.

Hindi na inungkat ni Marhianna ang napag-usapan namin. Nagpahinga lang kami sa hotel maghapon at lumabas nang mag-dinner kinagabihan.

"Who's that? Was that Alaric who calls you?" We are on the middle of eating our dinner when her phone rang.

She shook her head and smiled. "Your Tito Juddah will be here tomorrow."

My smile faded. "W-why?" This is supposed to be our mother and daughter bonding. So, why the hell Juddah would follow us here?

"I-I mean, hindi ba siya busy?" Bawi ko kaagad nang makita ang pagkunot ng noo niya.

"I thought you're okay with him now?"

"Y-yeah. Of course." Nag-iwas ako ng tingin. We're okay now and we came to the point na pinagtaksilan ka naming dalawa.

"Hmm." She nodded. "He cleared his schedule for five days. He said, he want to be with me and he want to get to know more about his future step daughter." She chuckled.

It's just normal for Marhianna and she just didn't know that it has another meaning already.

F*ck you, Juddah for dragging me to hell!

The next morning came, instead of having activity today, Marhianna decided to wait for Juddah bago kami mag-Island hopping. Bukas na lang namin 'yun gagawin.

Wearing the maxi beach dress Alaric gave me, plus my beach hat, lumabas ako ng hotel para maglakad-lakad sa dalampasigan. It's just only six in the morning at hindi pa gaanung kainit.

I was just picking up a shell when I saw a Hammock over the cottage at my left side. Binitiwan ko ang mga shell na hawak at tinungo ang duyan at nahiga doon. I wore my shades and closed my eyes. Pakiramdam ko ay dinuduyan ako ng hangin.

I really want this. I want to live near the sea. I want to have my own resort and rest house with so much glass window in it. Wherein, I can see the sun if it's rising or setting already.

Just by thinking about what I want, hindi ko namalayang nakatulog na ako. I just woke up when I felt the sun raise on my skin but was blocked immediately with a man.

And I was about to get up when the man vowed down on me and kiss me on the lips.

"What the hell!" I pushed him and get up only to find out that it was Juddah. Nagpalinga-linga pa ako at baka nasa paligid lang si Marhianna.

He chuckled. "Why are you so nervous, Maldrid? Relax."

I glared at him when he checked me out. "You look sexy but I don't like what you are wearing."

I leered. "Your opinion doesn't matter to me," I sarcastically said.

I simply scanned my eyes on him. He was wearing an open shirt and a denim. "And I don't like what you're wearing too." Nakalantad ngayon ang maganda niyang katawan dahilan para may mapatingin sa kanya.

Just like me, he's also wearing a shades and I got conscious dahil hindi ko alam kung anong tinitingnan niya sa 'kin.

His lips curved a bit. "You're hurting me baby. Your opinion matters to me though."

The whole day, I avoid Juddah. Ni isang beses hindi ako tumabi sa kanya during our activitiy. And I was so tired nang dumating ang hapon kaya diretso na ako sa hotel room ko.

We just had a dinner but after that, natulog na ako. I really want to go clubbing pero masyado akong pagod.

I really enjoyed our stay in the Palawan. Sulit na sulit ang ilang araw ko doon. Though, naiilang ako sa mga titig ni Juddah, I just shrugged it off na lang.

"Are you going to sleep here tonight?" I heard Marhianna asked Juddah as we went up stairs. Kadarating pa lang namin galing airport.

"I'm not sure. But I'll inform you."

I pretend that I was busy in my phone when I saw Juddah caressed Marhianna's face before his gaze bore on me.

"Okay--" Marhianna was cut off when her phone rang. And after she answered it, she heaved a sigh. "You really have to stay here for two days, Juddah. Aalis ako tonight with Alaric. He has emergency isa sa mga branch nila sa Ilocos and he needs me."

I saw how Juddah's jaw clenched before nodding.

At kinagabihan nga, sinundo ni Alaric si Marhianna para sabay na silang pumunta ng airport.

Madami ang naging bilin niya bago siya pumasok sa loob ng sasakyan.

"Maddi, don't be hard on your Tito, okay?"

I just nodded my head before turning my back on them. Pumasok ako sa loob, mayamaya pa, naramdaman ko na ang pagsunod ni Juddah.

Hindi ko siya pinansin at dumiretso sa taas but I wasn't expecting na susundan niya ako.

"Juddah!" Nanlaki ang mata ko nang yakapin niya ako.

"I missed you," He said then kissed me aggressively.

I tried to pushed him not because I can't breathe. But this is f*cking wrong.

"Stop please." Humabol ako ng hininga pero pansamantala lang pala 'iyun dahil muli niya na naman akong sinunggaban ng halik.

I really wanted to refuse. I wanted to push and slap him. Pero tinryador ako ng sarili ko at hinalikan siya pabalik.

He chuckled when I bit his lower lip. He carried me and went inside my room. Binaba niya ako sa kama at kinubabawan. Hinubad niya ang damit ko kasabay ng pagbaba ng labi niya sa leeg ko.

"Juddah," I moaned when his hand travelled on my thigh. He parted it and took my shorts off.

Gusto ko siyang pigila pero darang na akong masyado sa ginagawa niya. Ibinabaling ko na lang ang aking ulo pakanan at pakaliwa.

Hanggang sa namalayan ko na lang na kapwa na kaming walang saplot na dalawa.

I gasped when his hand touches my private part down there. I even arched my back when he kissed me there.

"Juddah!" My toes curl.

I was panting so hard when he went on top of me again. He again parted my legs and without a warning, he entered me.

Napasinghap ako sa sobrang sakit. Nakalmot ko rin ang likod niya pero sadya atang manhid si Juddah at hindi man lang tumigil sa paggalaw sa ibabaw ko.

"Your virginity won't stop me from thrusting. I'm sorry," he huskily whispered.

I bit my lower lip to suppress my moan. I hugged him thight and was about to close my eyes when the door of my room suddenly opened.

"Maddi, I forgot some-what the hell!?" Marhianna gasped as she started to cry while looking at us.