Dreaming Of You! [MJ]

Chapter 14

Chapter 14~Confusion

Selena leans on her bedroom door. She kissed Michael! It was not Michael's fault. It was all her fault. What had come over her like that? She takes in a deep breath.

The kiss was wonderful. Ten times better then when she kissed Chris. And Chris was a fantastic kisser. Her cheeks were still flushed and she could still feel his lips upon hers. Making her lip ache for more.

Now what? She was going to ruin her friendship she built with Michael. And she was going to ruin her love she built with Chris. All for passion. Because she could not control herself around Michael.

She was ruining everything. She always did. Tears come to her. Maybe she should not have come here without Chris. She should have listened to him. She never listened to anyone like she should.

Selena brushes back tears from her eyes with her right hand. She loved Chris. Chris. Why could her heart not remember that fact? She cared deeply for Michael that was all.

Things got out of hand. She would make sure that never happened again. She would try to make sure anyway.

Someone knocks on her door.

♥☆♥

"Suzette?" she softly says as she dries her tears quickly.

"No, it's me. Michael" he tells her. "Can we talk?" he asks her softly.

Her heart races then she opens the door.

"Your sister went to bed. Can we talk? Outside on the deck? It is nice night" he asks her.

"Sure" offers Selena with a nod.

He smiles then she follows him out to the back deck. She loved seeing the range of trees all the way out in the wilderness. She hoped to have a home with lots of land like this one day. And

loads of animals to. Like Michael had. But more of farm animals. Not a zoo really. She glances around her. She could see millions of stars above her in the crystal clear sky.

"Selena about the kiss. I am sorry about it. I still want to tour" he begins to ramble on.

He thought the kiss was his fault?

"Michael. That was all me. It was my fault not yours" she states. "we are still going on tour" she promises him.

"Good!" he sighs looking less worried.

"I wanted that kiss as much as you did" she admits.

He looks at her with hope now.

"But I don't know where this is leading. Or where it is going with Chris" she admits. "I am confused right now. I care deeply for you both" she explains.

"I understand. You thought you wanted to marry Chris. Things change though. You will figure out what you want" he tells her as he places both hands on her hands. They stand close together.

"I told Chris to hold off on the wedding planning. For now. Until after the tour. Can you wait to until after the tour? Give my heart some time to think things over? This is important. I don't want to chose the wrong person. I don't want to hurt either of you. I care so much for you both. Can you wait for me?" she softly asks him her request. "I just need time to figure things out"

"I can wait on you Selena. I know where I stand. I would like to be with you" he admits. "I will wait"

Her heart race. He wanted her? The king of pop wanted her? She was thrilled. She wanted him. This sucked. She did not know what to do. Maybe she did need a heart to heart with Suzette over the two men she loved.

Loved....

Was she falling in love with another man? With Michael?

He leans closer to her. He looked so handsome there in the moonlight with her. They meet in a kiss. Nothing else around them mattered. Just this kiss. Right now right here....

The next day she slept in. Trying to figure out what her heart wanted. Someone knocked on her door.

♥☆♥

"Sis wake up so we can have breakfast. MJ is already up" Suzette says as she comes in her room.

"Hi sis" she says yawning. Suzette leaps on her bed.

"I am sorry for falling asleep during the movie" Suzette laughs. "but I had to shower last night. So much popcorn in my hair. How did that happen Sel?" demands Suzette. Selena laughs.

"Sorry MJ and I did that to you" Selena sheepishly smiles and giggles.

"You are so bad" says Suzette.

The phone rings. Selena answers it knowing MJ allowed calls to go to her room.

"Hello?" Selena mutters with a yawn.

"Sel hey" Chris greets her.

"Morning babe" she greets him back.

"You never called me. You said you would last night" he confronts her. "I waited around for you Selena"

"I am sorry Chris. We were all watching a movie late last night. Then I fell asleep" she lies. She left out the part where Michael kisses her.

"Oh, did you go over the outfits for the tour?" Chris asks.

"Yes we did and he loved them. We also heard his song called the Earth Song" she brags. "it literally brought tears to my eyes and Suzette's to. You will be blown away when you hear it to"

"I am sure I will" says Chris.

"What have you been doing while I am gone?" Selena asks him.

"Hanging out with your brother. Going over some new music" he explains. "for the tour"

"Great! I am so excited for this tour" she promises him.

"How are you really feeling? You sure you are ready Selena? Before you did not want to tour" Chris reminds her gentle.

"I am taking things day by day. And you all are right. I needed to get back into it" she says. "thanks for always looking out for me" Selena praises him.

"I love you Selena. I miss you" Chris tells her.

"I miss you to Chris. Love ya" she says. "Look I have to go. We are about to join Michael for breakfast. See you soon" she says.

They hang up and guilt returns to her. She felt so bad.

♥☆♥

"What is going on Selena?" asks Suzette. "you look like you lost your best friend?"

"I am a horrible person" moans Selena.

"What is going on?" she asks her.

"Last night when you were in bed, Michael and I kissed" admits Selena.

"What?" stammers Suzette with shock. "Chris was right"

"I don't know what came over me" she softly says.

"Are you breaking up with Chris?" asks Suzette.

"No, I don't know what I want. I care so much for Michael and for Chris" sighs Selena. "I asked them to wait on me until after the tour. I never told Chris about Michael. He has gone through so much"

"What do you want? That is most important Selena" her sister says. "think of what your heart wants"

"That is just it. I don't know. But I do know I am deeply attracted to Michael. I am drawn to him like a moth to a flame" sighs Selena. "I can't stop myself"

"I can't blame you girl he is a looker" says Suzette. "Chris has not been boyfriend of the year either with all his drinking. But he has been so upset over almost losing you when you were shot. He never left your bedside when you were ill"

"I know. That is why this is all so hard" whines Selena.

"Don't whine sissy" laughs Suzette. "you got this. You will figure it out. Your heart will"

"Question is how long will my heart take to figure all this out? So I do not lose the love of my life?" wonders Selena. "why is love so complex?" she sighs.

"Come on. MJ is waiting for us to go to breakfast" Suzette demands. "let's enjoy the day. Not waist it worrying so much"

She had a good point. Time to get on with theday!

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