Her Humanity

Purposely Chosen

What is "love"?

Ha! How pathetic of me to think that a man would stick to someone because they truly are committed to wait for that someone.

So you can't wait for 5 months?

He was already trying to know someone and not even hiding the fact.

I admit I love the honesty but SERIOUSLY?! So you are ready to move on the second I say no at the end of the 5-month deal?

He said he also chose me because I was fun to talk to.

CHOSE?! So you're saying that was the only reason you proposed a relationship?

"If I were to reject you at the end of the 5-month period?"; "Then I'll go to the other I was trying to know"

... So you will immediately move on to another the second I say no. What's more hurting is that it is someone you are already trying to know?!

Did I just somehow hear him say "Just like how I get to know you"?

Ok.... what? So... I'm just a back-up? Is that what you meant? I- what in the world do you mean?!

...

...

Please assure me that you actually did have feelings for me until now. At least assure me that the fact that you are proposing such a relationship is because you still have feelings for me if you did. But then again, I don't think I would be the only one in your heart.

It hurt my pride that all I am is just another woman in your heart. I could never understand your perspective of this kind of relationship and I suppose I'll never know either. I don't want to pursue a love I know I will only be an option.

Our meaning towards this kind of relationship seems to be different. So for the best of both worlds, I end this now. Now while we haven't tied the knot yet. I know this hurts--Well, of course, it freaking hurts! I fear for my heart to be broken. I'm sure the same goes for you. I can't trust my heart to someone who I don't know if he will let go of it, the moment he changes his mind.

So thanks for... most of the things but we will never work out with how our current progress is going. That is the reason why I planned to wait for 5 months to give you an answer to move to the next phase. It stood to be very effective because I got to hear your perspective. For how you purposely chose me, I also purposely set my standards high.

-- HER

*END OF CHAPTER 3*